28. Lovely morning, isn’t it, David? Hey, are you alright?
29. Sure, I’m just fine. I go through life, singing a happy song.
30. You must be awfully worried about your father-in-law, I imagine.
31. Huh!
32. Have they paid any ransom to the kidnappers, as a matter of interest?
33. I don’t know, I don’t care, and I don’t want to talk about it!
34. Oh, sorry I spoke! By the way, Mr. Heftklammer isn’t coming for his private lesson.
35. He called to say he’s got a stomach upset.
36. Oh, good! I’ll go out and grab a coffee, then.
37. Hold on, David! This gentleman here wants to enroll for an English course. He’s done his written test;
38. perhaps you could mark it and give him his oral test, as you’ve got a free period.
39. Oh, very well. Come with me, please.
40. Thank you very much.
41. We’ll use that classroom down the corridor on the left. Er…room 5’s not being used at the moment, is it?
42. No, it’s all yours.
43. OK, sit down, please. Now, how much English do you speak? A great deal of English, or only a tiny little bit of English?
44. I have a reasonable command of the language, I would say.
45. Oh. I’ll give you the advanced test, then. Can you give me your enrollment form, please?
46. Here you are.
47. I see you come from Finland. Whereabouts in Finland?
48. I come from Pelkosenniemi in the Province of Lappi, in the northeast of Finland.
49. Good. Can you tell me a bit about Pelko… whatever? What sort of place is it?
50. It’s a small town, or you could describe it as a large village, with about 3,000 inhabitants, in the middle of a beautiful.
51. unspoiled scenery. And nearby is the magnificent National Park of Pietendori, with its mountains, its rivers and its forests full of tall pine trees.
52. Oh! Have you finished?
53. Yes, I have.
54. Sorry, I was miles away. Now I’m going to ask you a bit about where you learned English. Did you study it at school?
55. Yes, I studied it both at elementary school and at secondary school.
56. However, we studied mainly the written form of the language, not the spoken form.
57. The method my teachers followed was very old-fashioned by today’s standards.
58. Yeah, it must have been terrible, I’m sure. Uh… next.
59. Would you tell me a bit about your educational background, including any degrees, certificates or diplomas?
60. You’re not a bit like your father, you know.
61. What?
62. I’ve been watching you throughout this nonsense; you’re not half the man he is.
63. I’m sorry, you must be confusing me with someone else. My father’s dead.
64. Rubbish! You know very well that he’s alive and here in Washdon. Well, where is he?
65. The bastard owes me a million marks, he’s not going to get away from me again!
66. Hey, look, I have no idea where he is! I mean, really! He hasn’t told me.
67. Then who has he told? Come on, out with it!
68. Well, he might have gotten in touch with my sister. Her address is 26 Chernobyl Avenue.
69. If I don’t find him, I’ll be back!
70. Why me? Why? I need a drink!